All I ever wanted to be was, not just a mother, but to be the best mother. By expecting too much from myself, I was quite overwhelmed at the time when I was pregnant with my first child. I couldn’t wait to begin my motherhood journey, with poster perfect mom-baby images floating in my head. I waited for the tiny feet to walk into my life, and after hours of anxiety and a sleepless night, my bubble burst when the wait came to an end, with the arrival of my princess. Don’t get me wrong, it is by far the most memorable - most cherished day of my life; but what happened in the following few weeks, was something I wasn't prepared for.
Princess Heer would cry for long spells and no matter what I did or didn't do, the crying wouldn't cease. I tried breastfeeding, rocking, swaddling, and literally everything anyone would suggest without much success, I didn’t know what had hit me. I was so ashamed to acknowledge that I didn’t know what I was doing or what I was expected to do nor what I needed to do. The only thought that came to my mind was that I wasn't fit to be a mother as I had no idea how to take care of my own baby. Precious snuggles with my little one kept me going through the tough times, comforting me more than what I was giving her.
Finally, when I couldn't take it anymore, I sought medical help. Princess Heer was at that point diagnosed with a case of baby colic. Colic, I learnt are baffling bouts of crying in otherwise healthy babies, that has no solution and passes in time. This fussy phase goes on for hours at stretch, sometimes late into the night and worst of all are extremely difficult to help calm the baby, which compounds to frustration, worry and exhaustion. Most bouts peak at around 6 weeks and then typically start to taper off by 12 to 15 weeks. By three months most colicky infants seem to be miraculously cured. The colic may stop suddenly or end gradually, with some good and some bad days, until they are all good.
However, that didn't mean anything, as listening to my princess cry was heartbreaking and upsetting to a point that it took a physical and emotional toll on my wellbeing. And at that time, I did what I knew best, joined a moms’ group and spoke about it. I received a lot of encouragement and support from other moms who could relate to the issue and some who had faced similar situations. Some calming remedies that were suggested worked their magic most of the times and I was able to help my little one calm more often as the days went by. It was just the therapy I needed to be a sane mother, especially the second time around.
Being part of the moms' group made me realise that there were a lot of moms who had the courage to seek help and be better at motherhood with each passing day. It is the very thought that SC Johnson's All Out® applauds in its latest campaign #MujheSabNahiPata, which celebrates strong mothers who acknowledge that they don't know everything. During the release of the film, a panel discussion was organised between actress Sonali Bendre, renowned Paediatrician Dr. Samir Dalwai and Child Psychologist Dr. Rupal Patel which centred around the societal expectations of a mother in India. The most important aspect as Dr. Dalwai mentioned is not the issue itself but the alertness of a parent to the signs and changes in an infant’s behaviour, which could enable a quick resolution. Instances where a small insect can cause severe damage by spreading dengue can be arrested and fought off with timely intervention by being a vigilant mother and seeking help from experts.
Let us join this movement and like olden times tie a knot at the end of our attire to remind ourselves to share our #MujheSabNahiPata stories which can help other moms be more prepared for their beautiful journey. Looking forward to hearing your #MujheSabNahiPata stories in the comments section below.
Until next time,
~ Heena
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